Suara Murid Cikal - Rayyan Akmal Arsyad, Year 11 Sekolah Cikal Serpong

My knowledge with regard to parenting is obviously as little as a drop of water in the middle of the ocean. But as far as my mind can comprehend, being a parent while being aware of what is coming with it, is such an admirable task. As burdening one with a duty of letting a possibility of light manifest its potential, in the world of sufferings and malevolence requires the bravest of the bravest.

Moreover, having that big of a commitment and confronting both the chaos and the potential that a child may flourish in society is and always will be beyond one’s capacity to endure. No one will ever be ready unless they decide and go through it. For this reason, I’ve been admiring both of my parents to even dare burden themself with the responsibility of having me as a possible manifestation of good in the world. However, that isn’t always the case, because there were times where I wasn’t very informed and ended up putting them on my blacklist. As much as I do admire my father, this writing is meant for mother’s day, thus, I’ll try my best to make her the central focus of this painting of words.

(The portrait of Rayyan and her Mom. Dok. Rayyan)

"I believe that it rather isn’t an easy decision for a mother to be tough on her child. In view of the fact that she values her child as or sometimes even more than herself, knowing full well what it is like to be destroyed. "

The relationship between me and my mother is not always smooth and easy. There are many times where I put tears on her eyes and otherwise, but I’m glad we make it through this far. My memory is never one of my best features, ergo I’ll try to picture the rough roads we went through recently.

I wasn’t admiring my mother the way I am today when I was in middle school. She often gave me advice along the lines of doing your responsibility as well as you possibly can and playing the long game by starting thinking for your future. Meanwhile, at the same time, the transition between primary and middle school has unconsciously put the burden of social status and fear of missing out on me. As a consequence, there are lots of times where I abandoned her advice for the sake of short-term relief of not missing out. Moreover, she’s a tough woman. Thus, sometimes she won’t take a no for an answer and let me do my job independently instead of giving me a hand. As a result, I often perceived her as grumpy, unhelpful, and irrelevant.

It wasn’t until the pandemic hit, where we finally had time to properly discuss and understand the reason behind most of our steps and words that I fathomed why she acts the way she has been acting towards me. I’ve realized that most of the time, the reason why the things that I previously found irrelevant are kept being repeated is that they are the fundamental values of life. That being so, the ideas are eternally relevant as long as the blood runs through one’s veins regardless of the changes that are happening. Hence, I appreciate how my mother is willing to sacrifice the feeling of cliche in order to inform her child, knowing full well how irritable she was when she got the advice as a kid.

“…maybe it’s time for us to take a stroll with our mother and ask her about her life instead of merely thinking about how she should’ve taken care of us. That way, you’ll understand how courageous and incredible she truly is.”

Additionally, I noticed that what I often perceive as unhelpful and grumpy is a form of love instead of evil. Because as harsh as it may sound, the role of a mother is to offer her son to be destroyed by the world and die. Then perhaps he will live the way that will justify that by being a force of good in the nasty world instead of being a part of the suffering that may already be proliferated. Furthermore, it is often backbreaking to let the vulnerable parts of your soul suffer and be destroyed by the malevolence of the world. Hence, I believe that it rather isn’t an easy decision for a mother to be tough on her child. In view of the fact that she values her child as or sometimes even more than herself, knowing full well what it is like to be destroyed.

The idea that I was born as a hope of good force for the world, and my mother is willing to sacrifice and bear the countless burdens that contain within the hopes themselves has been one of my main drives to get through the rough patches of life. It has been very helpful in times of trouble, especially when giving up started to emerge as an option and dark vengeful fantasies lurk their ugly head onto my mind. I would’ve never been blessed with such knowledge if I hadn’t spent time with her discussing life in the first place. Therefore to sum this up, maybe it’s time for us to take a stroll with our mother and ask her about her life instead of merely thinking about how she should’ve taken care of us. That way, you’ll understand how courageous and incredible she truly is.

Profil Penulis

Rayyan Akmal Arsyad adalah seorang pelajar yang sedang duduk di bangku Kelas 11 Sekolah Cikal Serpong. Ia merupakan seorang buah hati dari 2 orang tua hebat yang kerap menjadi sahabat diskusi serta bagian berharga dalam keputusan di hidupnya. Di waktu luangnya ia gemar mengeksplorasi gagasan melalui berbagai media khususnya buku.

SEKOLAH CIKAL Sekolah Cikal Serpong Suara Murid Cikal

Other blog